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Being alone in a crowded roomRachel said Jul 7, 7:36 PM: |
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How is it that a person can be surrounded by people and yet feel so utterly alone some times? |
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Re: Being alone in a crowded roomMeredith said Jul 8, 3:44 AM: |
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Oh, absolutely. I have felt like that my entire life. It was different when I was a child and a teenager and I was still not entirely sure why I felt so different and so cut off. Now that I've become an adult and faced some serious changes and struggles it's grown much more deep and intense. I remember a couple of years ago going to a church activity - one like so many I'd been to before, with all the same people - and I felt like a non-entity. I wanted to cry, I was suddenly so overwhelmed with things I had been going through and how separated I felt from everyone. |
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Re: Being alone in a crowded roomRachel said Jul 9, 11:30 AM: |
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I've accepted the fact that I'll always be somewhat different than everyone else. I've been at peace with it for a couple of years now. I was just throwing it out there to see if anyone here has ever felt the same. |
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Re: Being alone in a crowded roomLeo said Oct 11, 12:47 AM: |
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Hello Meredith, |
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Re: Being alone in a crowded roomScherzo said Jul 13, 9:36 PM: |
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Hey Rachel, |
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Re: Being alone in a crowded roomRachel said Jul 14, 7:19 PM: |
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Hey Scherzo, |
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Re: Being alone in a crowded roomScherzo said Jul 14, 7:46 PM: |
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Agreed. I always find that knowing who and how I am helps me live my life to the best that it could be =) |
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Re: Being alone in a crowded roomRachel said Jul 16, 8:28 PM: |
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It is a great comfort to know that no matter how alone, lost, or cut off you feel, there is always someone out there who will understand. Everyone has there own unique experiance, and it's unlikely another person will go through the exact same things and feelings, but things can be closely related enough for another person to emphasize with you. Somehow, somewhere, there is always someone who will know what you're talking about. |
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Re: Being alone in a crowded roomSarie said Jul 17, 9:35 AM: |
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Sometimes lonliness is felt to strip you away of your worldy connections. Often times we find ourselves concentrating on fruitless banter. Small talk replaces ideas and stories replace the future. For a realistic person, sometimes it's just too much. |
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Re: Being alone in a crowded roomdaybrown said Jul 17, 12:05 PM: |
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I read Native Europeans evolved in agrarian villages of 150-300 over the course of the last 10,000 years; Africans in tribes of 75-150, with other hominids in these ranges. We dont live like that now, and aint very good at it. Hominids are not a mass herd species. |
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Re: Being alone in a crowded roomRachel said Jul 17, 7:24 PM: |
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I do enjoy a lot of alone time. I'm not exactly a social butterfly. My feeling of aloneness came more from having a different way of thinking compared to the mass majority around me. There are those few people who I can really talk to at home here. With the rest, there's only certain things that we can really talk about, without akward silences springing up. |
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Re: Being alone in a crowded roomJenny said Jul 18, 4:04 AM: |
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When I read this thread I was thinking - yes, I am different, too. I feel alone in crowded rooms. I feel alone with loving people around.
And I do think I'm different. But if all of us do, then who is not? Isn't it that we are all unique and thus feel different from others and that not only a few but a lot of people experience the feeling of secludedness in crowded places or among loving friends? Maybe it's not such a unique feeling… I've known this feeling all my life, too. I can be with people laughing and joking superficially or seriously talking and paying attention to every little detail and still totally shut myself off. It almost feels as though what was going on around me was a dream, something I was looking at but no part of. It doesn't always happen but it does happen. My friends have got used to the fact that sometimes I look bored, absent-minded and that I “excuse myself” (not verbally) in the middle of a conversation while still being physically present. Recently what has been happening to me a lot was that the more attention was paid to me and my current situation, the more secluded I felt. Instead of feeling embraced by my friends' love and understanding and wish to make me feel better, I felt lonelier than ever. Sometimes in conversations that are supposedly meant to cheer me up or to signal support to me, I almost panick inside because I can't focus any more and the world around just seems distant and unreal. So, yes, I know what you are talking about, Rachel. |
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Re: Being alone in a crowded roomNicole said Jul 18, 4:44 AM: |
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it is a painful place to be, dear Jenny. I hope that through your explorations you can come in time to a place of openness and light. warmest wishes! |
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Re: Being alone in a crowded roomJenny said Jul 18, 12:21 PM: |
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Dear Nicole, |
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Re: Being alone in a crowded roomNicole said Jul 18, 4:02 PM: |
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Dear Jenny, |
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Re: Being alone in a crowded roomRachel said Jul 23, 10:18 AM: |
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This differentness is both a blessing and a curse at times. We are all unique, but some of us travel on a slightly different wavelength than others. We can take solace in solitude and yet sometimes grow lonely from it. It is natural to want to be near others. It may sometimes feel like you're on the outside looking in. Not many of those close to us completely understand, but they do on some level. |
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Re: Being alone in a crowded room (to Meredith too :=])kalyse said Jul 24, 2:10 AM: |
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Hi everyone. |
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Re: Being alone in a crowded room (to Meredith too :=])Jenny said Jul 24, 2:43 AM: |
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Very well said, Kalyse! Thanks so much!!! |
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Re: Being alone in a crowded room (to Jenny too :=])kalyse said Jul 24, 3:13 AM: |
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Oops, Hi Jenny, |
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Re: Being alone in a crowded roomLand said Jul 24, 9:27 AM: |
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I think everyone feels that way at one point or another. For me, it was two semesters ago. For anyone that knows me, they know that I am massively a people person. I just need to be around people. They invigorate me and make me smile with all their little idiosyncracies (sp). But two semesters ago, I was so unhappy. And nothing I did would make me happy and I simply couldn't find a way to be happy. And I thought I had developed depression and it was freaking me out and all that. |
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Re: Being alone in a crowded roomlumpy said Jul 24, 11:55 AM: |
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u are all bunch of hippes go myspace is so much better |
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Re: Being alone in a crowded roomWoodstock said Jul 25, 2:35 AM: |
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I agree with you both. I feel like that a lot. You can be sitting with a group of friends in a conversation and not even feel actually present. You just feel like you don't belong with that group. You sometimes feel like you are not understood and that those people can't actually relate to you. It's like never truly finding people that know you and you can relate to on many levels, especially a spiritual level. It is definitely a frightening and lonely feeling and it does make you question whether you will ever be fulfilled or satisfied. I believe that I am currently in that state because I feel like I am always disappointed when I don't find anyone that I can connect with on multiple levels. Maybe it could be that my whole perspective and approach is wrong. Maybe the answer is in a different source, leading me to learn to depend more on God. But sometimes I think about how i yearn for something tangible, a person to interact with. |
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Re: Being alone in a crowded roomchloe said Jul 25, 9:01 AM: |
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yeah…we are all unique and so of course we all get that feeling, though often or not. |
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Re: Being alone in a crowded roomWoodstock said Jul 25, 10:09 PM: |
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I think what you are saying definitely makes sense. The feeling of being alone can be a very depressing and uncomfortable feeling. I guess when we start stepping into a potential danger zone is when we have to really reach for those that love us and prize our uniqueness! I think this website is a good meeting place. We have all met other people that have felt the same. And guess what? We are all in agreement so we are all understood. |
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Re: Being alone in a crowded roomDarlene said Jul 26, 2:36 PM: |
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I guess its natural to feel alone sometimes amid the crowds. If your not connected to those around you, it can seem like your not really with other, not part of the crowd. I can understand such feelings. Sometimes the loneliest places of all are the most crowded. Thats why its so easy to get lost in a crowd, one more person doesn't matter. I think thats why some recluses prefer cities where they can remain anonymous or nameless. |
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Re: Being alone in a crowded roomAmber said Aug 2, 3:10 PM: |
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I definitely feel that way a lot. Sometimes it's because I feel like I can't relate to anyone in the room. That no matter how hard I try they won't really understand me. |
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Re: Being alone in a crowded roomWoodstock said Aug 2, 9:19 PM: |
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I wonder if we may feel that loneliness because we may feel negative energy or vibes from certain people. Do you guys ever feel like you are being pulled away from a certain group of people because the energy just doesn't feel right? |
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Re: Being alone in a crowded roomThomaspost said Aug 6, 6:29 PM: |
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Growing up an only child, and a Cancer, I can definately relate to everything that is shared. I think I feel other people's energy alot more than I know, and often think it my own feeling. As an only child, I didnt have anyone to validate my feelings for me, and was not used to being recieved. It didn't feel safe to share my feeling with my parents either, so that has been the big rock I have been trying to pull up the hill. Recently I have been working on this by being in a spiritual community, The Center of Light, and been able to come out of my cancerian shell quite a bit. It is so helpful, and for me, pretty necessary to have people who are willing to recieve my feelings non-judgementally, and good for me to learn how to recieve others. I am seeing how for so long I thought everything was about me, and am trying to let that old way go. It is such a relief, and also because loving and serving is what my heart and soul has always decided. I wish you all blessings on bringing love into the loneliness and being healed. Thomas. |
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Re: Being alone in a crowded roomLUHBTA said Aug 6, 8:08 PM: |
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I can definately understand that feeling. I still feel it often in my own group of friends. It's not that they can't connect with me at all, it just seems like it's a different radio station (forgive my bad example). One thing that helps me when I'm really getting too deep in that emotion, I try and dive into a conversation, even if it doesn't help for more than three seconds. |
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Re: Being alone in a crowded roomAlana said Aug 6, 9:21 PM: |
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Sure have, Rachel. |
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Re: Being alone in a crowded roomRachel said Aug 6, 9:36 PM: |
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Ah. I know I am loved. I appreciate your words. There are so many interesting people here. Many with whom it is easy to connect with, some that require more effort. But still, it's nice to have some understand that this feeling is not simply a phase, but a simply a fact of life for some. Some don't fit in with the main crowd. I don't think it's a bad thing, although in the younger years it might feel that way. It's nice to be liked for who you are. For all the intelligence, quirks, idiosyncrasies, personality, and faults put together. Being genuine makes you feel great. And people, even those who are your opposites, admire genuineness, being yourself completely. |
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Re: Being alone in a crowded roomcasspoe said Sep 3, 5:47 PM: |
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Earlier today, I was thinking about something similar to your idea. I've been exploring more into how we each create our own individual world (or get stuck in our own ruts!) and I'm currently thinking about beliefs. What I've been reading speaks of our beliefs directly influencing our life. For an easy example about what I mean by beliefs (you could also call them “subconscious thoughts”), think about an overweight woman. She constantly tries to loose weight, and yet looks at her self in the mirror often and thinks, “I'm so fat!” Her “subconscious” belief is: I am fat. So she's going to be compelled to not exercise or to give into her will power and eat badly because that's what she believes. You can't think, “I am fat” then suddenly loose weight and become skinny. |
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Re: Being alone in a crowded roomphairet said Sep 12, 5:34 PM: |
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Being alone is what we all are. In a crowd or not. How many still have the same friends, with the same ideas, and the same level of education or knowledge as 5 or 20 years ago? I have been trying to fit in every where I went in life, up in till about 6 months ago, when I left my husband for good; and the life we had together for over half of our life time was over. We were friends for 17 yrs., and now that I understand why we can not be together, I realize that we were never together in the first place. |
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Re: Being alone in a crowded roomshitmonkey said Sep 13, 9:40 AM: |
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I lived in a tent on a mountianside through the Colorado winter and beyond, so I know what you are talking about. We are a bunch of spoiled people I know, but it is also nice to know that camping in the middle of the wilderness waiting for something to come and eat you is not the answer either. Neither is packing in your food on your back, freezing in the winter, finding that even the water in the can of veggies you have to eat is frozen, the everything is wet and there is no way to start a fire or to get warm, and that leaves do not make good toilet paper….. |
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Re: Being alone in a crowded roomTigertree said Sep 13, 4:18 PM: |
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Hi all,
CAn only speak for myself but must hypothesising why! Ive been alone many times in a room full of people, been often described as very sociable and full of life… how so?? So how does that make sense, a dearth of people who you feel you can connect with, where nothing feeds your energy field with love and affection. Working in london, its commonplace to get this, and many people there do. We can compromise ourselves by making small talk in order to connect with people we wont keep in contact with, just to fill the gap. Maybe we learn about ourselves when we feel that way, maybe its alesson about where we are as opposed to where we should be??? Its normal to feel this way in certain situations and thats why we are all on here, on this forum, on this thread! So lets just accept it as a part fo life in its current state and say hello and connect with each other on here, after all we are all here for a reason, right?? peace A |
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