Add your own deepest wishes to the pot. It doesn’t hurt to ask!
MY CHRISTMAS LIST:
-a very large white rabbit who is box-trained and doesn’t chew electrical cords
-a time-machine that will take me into the present at any moment. heehee!
-all episodes of South Park, whether purchased or pirated. i’d do time for Cartman. (sigh!)
-a clone. (suck it up, toots – you’re on grunt patrol)
-a car. specifically Ned Tannen’s red cobra.
-10 days in a killer recording studio. or one day in a remotely decent studio with an engineer who is not on heroin and will not accidentally erase my files or try to jump me at the end of the session.
-telekinetic powers, specifically to be used on musical instruments, vocal chords and freeways
-trip to exotic land with friendly monkeys, elephants, volcanos, and/or tabla players
-for the lazy shoppers out there, i am really very fond of Ben Franklin. especially in the plural.
-a new toilet seat and a new refrigerator. a power drill would also be nice
-a trampoline
-joy to the world. or Ned Tannen’s red cobra, whichever seems more reasonable.
-a time machine so i can go back to 1970-whatever and hook up in a band with Jimmy Page
-a boyfriend. one that i really, really like who loves me the way i am. barring that, seven hours trapped in an elevator with Eddie Vedder after he and current g.f. have mutually decided they’re not attracted to each other any more at all and want to start seeing other people
-a three-toed sloth (baby. potty trained.)
-a date who will take me to see Borat. then a bonfire on the beach, complete with Bailey’s Irish Cream and boogie boards.
-the book “Seven Habits of Highly Successful People.” I’m told I need it
-a time machine to go back to the morning of July 13th, 2003
-did I mention how much appreciation and genuine respect I have for Ned Tannen’s car?
-a 10 minute visit with Babaji
-total enlightenment.






